#16 - Pristine, Lean, And Ready For Sunscreen

…or more like Lean, Mean, and Ready for Ice Cream. Beege and Wayne Bretzky swing on my Biergarten Studio (sponsored by Linen Closet Brewing Company) to have a good fashioned ol’ chit chat with JBGK (aka Zoe) and Bryan from Kickball. Though we’ve been friends for a long time (as established on the air) we decide to do everyone’s favorite ice breaker for Three Stars: favorite ice cream flavors. This week on the internet, Zoe spits some truths about going green, Brett gets nerdy about 90s music, and Bryan does a deep dive on hippos.

Our Bonks this week include things our moms got scared about because they watch the Today Show, the combination of colorblindness and sense of style, and auto repair. For beers, we are thrilled about farmers’ markets, high school reunions, Little League Champs reunion shows, and learning how to ride a scooter. To round us out, we have plenty of Burps on the horizon including an upcoming trip to Staunton and the engagement of our super fan couple Mark and Allie! Mazel tov!

#15 - Groupon Suit With A Zips Alteration

Coming to you live from our new location from Biergarten Studios sponsored by Linen Closet Brewing Company the Boys are back for SEASON 2. We’ve got Bryan from Kickball, Dr. Jones, Nedbot, and Beege in the house with Brett in absentia. Kicking off our new season, new Homebrew just dropped, and we share our thoughts on the latest from LCBC, the Overwhelmed By Sweatshirts: An Aggressively Snug Vanilla Porter. This week on the internet, Beege talks angry geese attacks, Bryan breaks down the backlash to the backlash to the Sonic the Hedgehog Movie, Dr. Jones has his own thoughts on movie spoilers and growing potatoes in a bucket, while Nedbot makes his pitch for the Bills Mafia. New season, same ol’ BS as we close things out with the triple B’s: no, not Big Baller Brand, it’s of course Bonks, Beers, Burps. The Pupatella Garage was abandoned, and JENNIFER gets put on blast, Beegie has the commuter blues, and we begrudge Adulting (both the term and the thing it describes.) On a lighter note, we highlight our hikes, the kindness of strangers, and GWGs. The story of the night is Brian’s tale of buying a suit on the internet and getting it tailored IRL.

#14 - Name Of The Year 2019

It's the SEASON 1 Burpcast finale, we're joined by friends and enablers of the show, Jimbob Ghostkeeper and Meatball. It's the end of an era at the Pupatella Garage / Ballston Animals Hospital Recording Studios, and our Three Stars of the week throws it all the way back as we reminisce about our top three things that we miss about childhood. Nedbot shares how Brother Mark taught him how to flirt via AIM, and we go all the way in on the Wifi vs. Air Conditioning debate. Speaking of Jimbob Ghostkeeper, our What Did You Do On the Internet This Week is a big one: it's the 2019 Name Of The Year Tournament, so grab your brackets and make your Salami Blessings as we do a deep dive to determine this year's alias authority. Finally, we close out the season with some #memz of our OG recording space, and all of the times we had here. Thanks to everyone for tuning in for season 1 -- we'll be back with a new season and a new recording space in the weeks to come!

#13 - He Drinks A Whiskey Drink, He Drinks A Vodka Drink

It’s company party szn and the boys are feeling the holiday spirit. Things get a little silly this week — or maybe just sillier than your average bear — as we kind of just wing it and see what happens.

#12 - Burp Boys To Burp Men

We have our first repeat visitor as the power couple known as Cashleigh crashes the show to keep it real during spraaang breaaaaak. We discuss our top sports day of the year before getting appropriately lubed up with what we’re sippin’ on. On the internet this week, we find our spirit animals with the Florida Man Challenge and break down Beatles Beef. For Bx3, Ashleigh keeps it loose and everything else… not loose. Also: wedding registry etiquette, monetizing hobbies, and runner’s high.

#11 - You Are Now Subscribed To CatFacts.com

Very special friends of the show Mark and Allie join us for a special Pi Day celebration, and although we did a solid half-hour discussing our favorite tasty baked treats, you’ll just have to take our word for it because it didn’t record properly. We share some daily affirmations and heady self-reflections. Chris discusses the value of reading your lease and checking your credit card statements. Mark got hit by a car. Beege remembers Remember the Titans. We close things out by going in a really, really weird direction courtesy of Brett’s LDR-induced... curiosity.

#10 - Spider Bro And Prom Drama

We’re back and we covered a lot of ground. In no particular order, this on week’s episode we address the aging process, text-based memes, twinning, desk ergonomics, overdraft charges, password security, the tyranny of choice, and whether or not Fleetwood Mac is good.

Also, we find out once and for all who is the best of us by comparing our Uber passenger ratings.

#9 - Pew Pew Pew!

Sometimes you begin with a plan, and then things take a turn: that's what happened on this night. With a "dogged" pursuit of the "siren's song" of science, The Boys set off on a fact-finding mission of a sonic nature and left no stone unturned. Many thanks to our many, many wonderful guest/subjects who joined in to help us answer the question posed by the streets: are girls good at making sound effects?

#8 - Trust Me, I Was A Marketing Major

Jimbob Ghostkeeper (aka Zoë) calls in to fire off some spicy takes and a harrowing tale of fired off hot sauce, and shakes things up by leading us off with Bonks, Beers Burps. Chef Chris provides some counsel on how to go a month without eating out, and introduces us to his stuffed jalapeno corners for THE BIG GAME in Chris' Kitchen. I got a lot of problems with you people and now you're gonna hear about it! As we crack open a homebrew to review, Airing of the Grievances: A Festivus Milkshake NEDIPA from Linen Closet Brewing Company. In a new ad hoc segment, "Where In The World Is Boys Night A Burpcast?" Champs the Drummer joins us on assignment from Seattle to discuss how he didn't choose the grunge lifestyle, the grunge lifestyle chose him. After weeks of build-up, hype, and anticipation, the Hendrices have plenty to report on their journey to the great white north for their annual pond hockey trip. After a nice sandwich/shower sojourn, Brett does a thought-provoking drive by that no one was really ready for, and forces us to ask “what are we doing with our lives?” … Other than playing a lot of Rock Band. Finally we wind down with What Did You Do On The Internet This Week?: Beege hates mean pranks, Chris likes animals doing things, Neal watched hockey, and Bryan laughs at laughter.

#7 - Boys' Nightmares - A Dreamcast

Yippee! It’s a Brett episode! The Champs Drummer joins us to make it a full house on the first [actually our second, whoops…] show of 2019. We kick things off with What [We’re] Sippin’ On, try our hand at re-recording the segment jingle, and audition for Marlon Brando’s understudy in the remake of A Streetcar Named Desire. Because we clearly lack necessary social skills, Chris plays the host as Neal practices talking about "what he's into" when talking to strangers in social settings (spooky!) We’re thrilled to introduce our newest segment: What Did You Do On The Internet This Week? … It turns out, it was a lot of stuff! Brett throws his hat into the ring to host the Oscars, Chris gets an extended National Championship edition of Tiger Talk, and Beej welcomes a special guest: Baby Knees Donegan who talks about Ted Talks and “yogajacks.” Did that joke land? No, it did not. Did we power through? You bet we did. Also, Chris is fixated on the autonomy of the majestic starfish. We get into Bonks, Beers, and Burps and discuss how hard it is to get up in the morning. Brett leads us on a tour of dreamland as we do a deep dive on what we see when we sleep, both pleasant dreams and our nightmares what one early listener has referred to as “the most interesting conversation you’ve had on the show thus far.” Bryan from Kickball has plenty of dreams but many, many more nightmares and really truly does not want to go to jail. Finally, we close things out with a final preview of some of our upcoming travels, and a definitive discussion of when it’s okay to storm a basketball court.

#6 - The Perils Of Middle School Dating

We very nearly missed this episode, which was stowed away in a vault at Burpcast headquarters, but indeed THIS was our first show of 2019. We kick things off with a discussion of how we spent our New Years Eves, including an excursion to Diapertown, USA. Our Three Stars discussion this week covers first date movies: Bryan from Kickball shares the juicy details of his 7th-grade dating game and nearly comes to blows with Dr. Jones as they fight over a shared #1 star. In an abbreviated What You Sippin’ on, you’ll never guess what Brett brought over… While we do a little sweater swap of brews from notable Maryland “B cities.” This week on the internet, we dive into YouTubue’s horrible year in review, while Chris proves he knows more about the interwebs than all of the rest of us combined. Nedbot and Beege Roomba throw it way back to a little ditty about some sweet treats. We have a special guest in the building to join us for Bonks, Beers, and Burps as the power couple known as Crashleigh stops by and earns a producer credit. Bryan has a persnickety sleep regimen, Wayne Brettzky channels his Wayne Gretzky in the top shot challenge, Neal chases Vanessa Hudgens who was riding a piano car down the middle of a city street, and Ashleigh tells us about her favorite hobby: harvesting cat blood.

#5.2 - The Parking Space Saga

The post-intermission Bonks, Beers, Burps of our two-part episode features Brother Mark, he regales us with the tale of Parking Spacegate (aka Parkghazi) and the struggles of both incompetent home owners associations and not making enemies of your neighbors. We go into detail on how to correctly get a haircut, and then we rank all the meats and the joys of a good Christmas goose. There’s plenty to look forward to as everyone has travels on the way, the Hendrickses have their pond hockey trip with the Virginia Wolves in Minnesota, and Bryan From Kickball is going through all the movie tropes on the road: a shotgun wedding, meeting the parents, AND an 80s ski slope misadventure. Finally, we have a surprise special musical guest- the next door neighbors who class up the joint with some ambient Mozart played through the shared wall.

#5.1 - Everything Is Either Pancakes, Waffles, Or French Toast

The Bupcast Boys are joined by a very special guest this week, Brother Mark... What do we do with all these Hendrickses (Hendrices?) We kick things off with Three Stars of our top rivalries (sports, cartoons and otherwise.) On this weeks' What You Sippin' On? We have a special Homebrew Review of "The Smog In L.A." wherein we discuss the propensity of homebrews to be used as cleaning solution. Finally, we round out the first part of our week by looking ahead to new years' resolutions and finally getting around to finishing that darn screenplay...

#4 - Jockin' Jams & Go-Go Juice

After a few week break the Boys are back, staring things off with our most over-produced segment in Burpcast as we reel off our top fight songs/ stadium anthems for Three Stars, and use the opportunity as an opportunity to either start beef with or befriend Eminem. It took four episodes but we’ve finally gone fully polar on beer tastes going completely divergent between some exclusive Black Friday stouts, and Canadian pond water (that’s Labatt Blue Light, obviously.) We reminisce about the time well had to get a Sherpa to guide us to the very peak of Nationals Park for some special summer beer, and as always Bryan hopped on the #BuyMoreBrownAles train. This week on the internet we discuss Chris’ crusade to kill the American shopping mall while Beege joins 2012 and gets on Instagram (follow US on @burpcast!) before putting on his entrepreneur hat to brainstorm how to monetize food puns. Bonks, Beers, Burps this week relives Neal’s rickshaw NYE misadventures before we wade into the Hey Arnold Trivia Hour.

#3 - Upp Til Hópp'ed Up

The Boys’ are back – namely the Twins have made travel return and bring back a traditional Icelandic tune to share with us – and it’s a real banger. We duke it out over the best breakfast cereals and Chris shares some adventures of his own, namely braving the treacherous conditions of camping out on Black Friday morning in pursuit of the seven stouts to fill the Infinity Gauntlet of… Destiny? (I didn’t see The Avengers so I’m not entirely clear on how this simile works.) Afterwards, we do a brief but deep dive into our respective alma maters football fortunes with the Tech Sec, Tiger Talk, and a yet to be named discussion of Franklin & Marshall athletics. Finally, we round things out with Bonks, Beers, and Burps discussing habitual office coughers, flat tires, and the simple joys of deviating from the norm.

#2.3 - You Can Really Taste The Stripes

On our final leg of the evening, Dr. Jones takes off his stethoscope and puts on his toque blanche to debut some home cooking on “Chris’ Kitchen.” We round things out with BBB (Bonks, Beers, and Burps for the uninitiated) and become old men who yell at the sky because the weather sucks right now. We learn about Fart Mountains and make our first play for a corporate sponsorship from Fruit Stripe Gum. There’s plenty to be jazzed about including soups and flannel, and we preview Nedbot and Beege Roomba’s upcoming trip to Iceland.

#2.2 - Score More Points, Win The Game!

As we are wont to do from time to time, the Burpcast Boys have a sports discussion itch that we go ahead and scratch. Of course we covered the important stuff like RGB getting back to work after dunking over Dwight Howard and the results of ball hockey playoffs before getting into the state of each DC professional sports team. We cover the good (¡Vamos United!), the bad (a Caps' Cup hangover?), and the ugly (Landover, MD in every sense.) We'll take PayPal and Venmo contributions for editing out 43 minutes a deep dive and complex dissection of everyone's fantasy hockey teams.

#2.1 - I Don't Even Know What A Squab Looks Like

We made it to a second episode and didn’t get cancelled. We start off with Three Stars and as Thanksgiving approaches, we debate what the best dishes are for Turkey Day. For What Chu Sippin’ On, we learn what popcorn style is and go into a Homebrew Review for “Happy Little Mistake” as part of our #BuyMoreBrownAles crucade. This week we also debut our new segment: “What Did You Do On The Internet This Week” and go surprisingly wholesome with our responses before paying lip-service to our target audience, the Fortnite Teens (Four-Nineteens?)

#1.3 - Bonks, Beers, and Burps

Okay, so the last episode title may have been misleading — we’re couldn’t go an entire night without talking a little bit of sports. We did that at… some length, mostly to discuss our collective and individual fandoms of predominantly DC-area sports.

The Burpcast Boys then rounded out out our initial gathering with our closing segment: Bonks, Beers, and Burps - which is our play on roses thorns and buds. We chatted about the things that are going well, not so well, and what we’re looking forward to in the future, in addition to giving a shout out to our target audience: the Fortnite Teens.

#1.2 - We're Not A Sports Podcast But...

We introduce the "Tech Sec" to indulge those among us for just one brief moment an acknowledgment of their alma mater, Virginia Tech, and discuss the merits of shower beers. In the tradition of new podcasts everywhere, we straight crib a successful segment from another show and ask: "Fire-building: Is It Sports?" Finally, Brett regales us with a tale of how the Berenstain Bears are a collective fever dream, or something to that effect.

We're joined by friend of the show, Eagle Scout Adam.